Archive for the typical day Tag

Hell On Earth AKA Pre-K Day at the Nature Center

It’s Monday. . .again.  Just a few more Monday’s and hopefully I’ll be able to evict the fast growing little parasite who is taking up a lot of premium real estate in my body. . .make room for some good fall beer. . .Or to breathe. . .Both seem vital to me currently. Anyway, on Mondays the local nature center
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What To Do When It Literally Comes Crashing Down

Last Thursday, I was awake early, itching to get rid of another 50 percent of something in this house.  What exactly I wasn’t sure, but with big plans the following few weekends, I have to get stuff done. . .as fast as I can. I futzed around in the basement moving some junk into a pile for donation.  I did
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I Seemed to Have Misplaced My “Give A Damn”

So the kid stuck it to me good yesterday. He was up early in the morning.  We hit the Park and we walked a lot.  So by the time we got home, he was pretty tired and testy.  While I was getting him some lunch, he asked for “cray” and “pay-per.” I am always happy to oblige when he asks
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“Look, Do U Want It To Poop Or Not?”

Long time readers of this blog know I have two sisters and two brothers.  One sister just had her first baby about 5 weeks ago.  The other sister has a son age 12 and a daughter age 6.  They are amazing children.  Still, she has her hands plenty full. Friday night about 11:30, I was in the depths of our
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In Which Sour Cream Nearly Causes The Kid To Have A Nervous Breakdown

Do you think toddlers know when they are acting like a jerk? I mean when I was a kid, I recall being able to recognize that I was behaving like an asshole. . .not that it stopped me. . .sometime around the age of four.  Yet I’m not sure what the state of my self-awareness was prior to that. I’m
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BREAKING! Men Caught Inappropriately Sharing Their Nuts

If you recall, a few weeks ago I had an unpleasant encounter with a squirrel in Patterson Park.  And a few days after that, I was actually physically accosted by one of those little bastards. It’s not something you can just shake off.  TRUST ME. I still feel my leg tingling where that fluffy-tailed little son of a bitch latched on.
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Reluctant Mother v The Squirrels

I have to confess something:  I’m scared to go to the Park. It’s not the fear of junkies or garbage or any of the other unsavory things you might imagine inhabit an urban park. . . It’s the SQUIRRELS!! Yes.  The squirrels. They’re out to get me. They have almost succeed twice in nearly as many days. Oh you can
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Thanks For The Memories!

For anyone that checks out this little slice of Internet Heaven on a routine basis, you are well aware I am a repeat offender, perpetually at the top of everyone’s naughty list. Fortunately for me, “naughty” is a relative term and my Husband clearly has a high tolerance for insanity, bullshit, irresponsibility, and sloth. . .which means the poor guy
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Psst. . .Can You Hear That?!

Can you hear that? It’s the sound of the scant amount of dignity I have left. It’s crying out for HELP! It’s making a sound like un-manicured nails being drug down a chalkboard, screeching, hanging on. . .valiantly fighting for life. . .trying not to slip away. . .as my husband and child try to completely snuff it out. Saturday,
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What the Hell is Going on Next Door?!

When I was younger and just slightly less foolish, I used to mercilessly mock my own Mother and maternal Grandmother for being “nosey.” (Not often to their faces mind you. . .mostly behind their backs. . .perpetuating a “gossipy” cycle of discussing another’s business while they aren’t in your presence.  Remember that drug commercial where the kid screams “I learned
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