Archive for the 'Required Reading: Diary of a Reluctant Mother' Category

Who The EFF is Riley?! Damn, Who The Hell Am I?

Ok. You know me, you know this much:  I am a Mom and I take that seriously – more seriously than I’ve ever pursued anything else in my life. I want to soak up every moment I have with my children before they decide they hate me err become independent. . .So, I. AM. ALWAYS. LURKING. We don’t have babysitters.
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There’s a Heartache Tonight

We had a rough afternoon.  Period. Mac was particularly moody, unkind, disrespectful, inconsolable. . . I tried to help him. I tried. There were moments when I was feeling less than charitable with the “amenities”  he was demanding this evening after the time out for scratching my face. . .or dragging Teddy across the room on his back by one
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It’s the Friday Funny: Husband v. Used Car

Just before Teddy was born, we got a “new to us” car.  There was just no way I could cram another car seat into my VW convertible.   And while I’d love to be a one car family, Baltimore just isn’t completely there yet with its public transportation system. . . Anyway, it was a used car but a NICE
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Another Dirty Little Parenting Secret. . .

It’s time for me to reveal yet another dirty little parenting secret:  I’ve been co-sleeping.  With Teddy.  A. LOT. Pretty much part of every night. I. KNOW! Or I don’t know? I’m not sure what to make of it? With Mac we were SO determined to keep him out of our bed, I spent countless nights on his bedroom floor.
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“And I Shall Name Him Baby Dutch!”

In early October we took the kids to the beach for the weekend.  I really prefer the beach in the fall after all the tourists and humidity are gone. We had a really nice time.  Our lodging wasn’t exactly luxury but it was a block from the Ocean and it had a little indoor pool and a separate bedroom –
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New Year’s Eve Mystery: A Story About A Bitch and Her Broom. . .

So, we have a lot of catching up to do. . .And I own that mess.  And I’m hoping I can clean it all up. . . Anyway, speaking of cleaning up. . . I actually like like like some of the women I met at the neighbor’s playgroup nearly a year ago.  And when the weather is good we
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Dear Liam’s Mom,

So Mac’s been in preK just shy of a month now. He goes twice a week. And we missed Monday because we were at the beach. However, the Monday before that, I was sitting in the parent conference beside Liam’s mom. I refer to her as Liam’s mom because I don’t know her name. He son’s name is Liam. And
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“Your Children Have Magnificent Heads”

OF HAIR? MAGNIFICENT HEADS OF HAIR?! RIGHT?!!!!! THESE BOYS HAVE GREAT HAIR! Nope. Not.  Even.  Close. “So Mom, these kids have ginormous heads.  How did that work out for you?  Ouch.” Said the volunteer at the Patterson Park Pagoda. Is this even happening?   What?   Hold up. You’ve seen my children and all you can mention is that they
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Raising Boys: Reluctant Mother v. #RAY RICE

A man walks into an elevator. . .(at 4AM?!) And makes a very poor decision. And WHOA.  CONSEQUENCES. I’ll mention now, as far as I’m concerned it’s NEVER okay to do harm to another.  I don’t care about your beliefs, your past, any stress you might be feeling.  It’s NEVER okay.  NEVER. And this is why I decided the Naval
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Parenting Fail? Teeing Up A Shitty September. . .And October. . .And FOREVER!?

BLERGH!! My head is spinning. . .and it’s not lack of sleep and copious booze (this time). Positively spinning. . . I feel like I just got a gigantic bucket of obligatory preschool activity shit dumped on me. And what have I done? sign up.  STROKE CHECK.  sign up.  STROKE CHECK.  sign up.  STROKE CHECK. erhmahgawd we’ll be broke in
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