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Friday Funny: The Greatest Gift Of All

My Mother-in-Law is a very kind woman.  And considerate.

Me?

I’m mostly a jerk.

So you can imagine how she must feel about anything she does for me.

Conflicted?  Mildly beat up?  Angry?

Anyway, I love her and despite my insanity and jerk disposition, I do appreciate all that she does for our family.

So I had a birthday a few weeks back and we didn’t see one another.  Still, she got me a gift.  . .

A very thoughtful gift. . .  

She got me a book called Life List.  It’s about one of the most obsessed birders in all of forever and her quest to see a mind-boggling number of bird species – around the world. . .at almost any cost.

Phoebe fascinates me.

Anyway, it was a home run gift.  I CANNOT wait to read this book.

In fact, Chris and I have been taking turns reading it aloud when we’re all in the car together. . .driving somewhere. . .to do what else but see more birds. . .

(Which is an awesome concept Chris put into action. . .The kids get exposed to all sorts of vocabulary and composition they wouldn’t normally hear.  They get to hear our inflection while we read, they can stop us to ask questions. . .)

Anyway, this is supposed to be a funny post. . .

So for a multitude of reasons, I didn’t see my Mother In Law to get my much desired gift.  She gave it to Chris.

And when she gave it to Chris she mentioned that she didn’t realize. . .

SPOILER ALERT!!!!

That Phoebe dies.

That she felt kinda’ bad about it.

That she tries so hard to select a good gift for me but sometimes she’s not certain she did a great job.

(Feel my heart being squeezed a bit. . .I suck.)

“She said that?” I asked Chris.  “That makes me feel awful.  I don’t want her to feel that way.”

“Don’t worry,” Chris replied.  “I told her she already gave you the best gift you could ever get. . .”

“What was that?” I asked.

“Me.  Her son,” said Chris.  “I’m her best gift to you.”

Right.

NO WONDER THIS WOMAN FEELS PRESSURED TO FIND ME A PERFECT GIFT!