Home » Of Sickness and Sippy Cups. . .

Of Sickness and Sippy Cups. . .

Yesterday’s missed post brought to you courtesy of toddler turned snot rocket.

This kid is amazing.  Sunday morning he was up and at ’em albeit with a bit of a runny nose.  And within the hour is was feverish and ready to crash.



The dreaded kid cold!

So soon?  AHHHHHHHH!!!!!

But by 5:30AM yesterday morning, he was awake and ready to roll apparently already on the road to a complete recovery.

And by 5:30PM yesterday he was driving me OUT OF MY MIND.

Sicko feels better

His immune system amazes me.

Speaking of me. . .my throat’s sore.  And there’s little doubt in my mind it will take my own immune system seven to ten days to deal with the same stupid germs.

So anyway, with him awake at the crack of dawn, I didn’t have the time to compose an incoherent rant about. . .SIPPY CUPS.

Yes.  Sippy cups.

I hate those plastic fuckers more than just about any other baby product.  EVER.

It seems like a simple enough concept:  It’s a simple shatter-proof cup with a cap and some sort of spout or straw that allows a toddler to effectively get a drink WITHOUT spilling a vat of said liquid all over himself or his environs.

But apparently our modern civilization – with all of its technological advances and wonders – has not yet been able to engineer a cup that REMAINS LEAK PROOF following several uses.

We’re on our THIRD brand of sippy cups currently and every brand we’ve tried has performed beautifully for a few weeks and then BAM!  before I know it, there’s freaking milk all over the car, the dog, or ahem, the carpeted nave of our Church.  (And yes, I did just kinda rub it around with my hand and hope someone thought it was spilled holy water.  Consider this my confession).

I’m convinced there is no good design.  Most of the straws or spouts are silicone or some other sort of squishy plasticky rubber that society has decided won’t cause cancer or the growth of superfluous nipples this week.  Why?  WHY ARE THEY RUBBER?

Childless Baby Product Designer:  “Hey, I’ve got a great idea!  Let’s make a cup for a demographic that’s teething, gnawing through shit faster than rabid rodents, complete with soft rubber spouts!”

Childless Baby Product Marketer:  “That is a GREAT idea!  And we’ll make sure that the replacement nipples are a real bitch to purchase. . .In fact, let’s make the replacement spouts MORE EXPENSIVE than an entirely new, whole sippy cup!  We’ll be RICH!  RICH!  Maw-hahahahaha!”

Yes.  The replacement spouts cost more in some cases than a brand new CUP.  And they aren’t readily available in a Target.  You have to order them online.  And SOMETIMES the shipping is even more expensive than the replacement spouts themselves!

This pisses me off.

But I get it.  Sippy cup makers aren’t non-profits or charities.  Sippy cup makers are looking to make bank.

And they are. . .Probably off me alone. . .because I’m stubborn and my kid is VERY particular about his sippy cups. . .

So after he gnawed through about 8 silicone nipples, I optimistically procured a NEW brand of cups.

These cups didn’t have a silicone nipple.  They had a plastic cap with a molded plastic spout – making them gnaw-resistant (and probably potentially damaging to his teeth but I was willing to chance it at this point).  As a bonus, they were insulated, and had cute illustrations on them.

We started with two cups just to see how things would go.  The kid approved.

So I purchased four more.  And naturally it was THEN that we discovered that the silicone valve inside the plastic lids was NO LONGER STAYING IN PLACE MAKING THE CUP LEAK WORSE THAN A LACTATING WOMAN IN A ROOM FULL OF CRYING BABIES!!

Those sippy cup designing assholes won AGAIN!!

I can feel my face flush and my blood pressure skyrocket every time I unscrew the lid to check that the rubber valve is secure, but I’ve made a firm decision: I’m not going to win this game, so I’m done playing.

WE ARE NOT BRINGING ANOTHER SIPPY CUP INTO THIS HOUSE!  I don’t care if the sippy cup has some kind of bizarre image of Christ himself mysteriously molded into the plastic, WE DON’T WANT IT!

Mac should be ready for his own stainless water bottle soon enough. . .

And until then?

Well, there’s no point crying over spilled milk, right?

PS We still do love our Thermos brand stainless sippy cups. (I raved about them a long time ago).  Although, we use them mostly for travel so they haven’t seen the daily abuse the other cups have.






2 Responses to “Of Sickness and Sippy Cups. . .”

  1. Rick says:

    My twin grandchildren go to daycare daily, and they seemed to be continually bringing home one creeping crud or another. We watch them in the afternoon once a week, and it seems whatever they catch they give it to one or both of us. Hate it!

  2. Dani Ryan says:

    Sorry to hear about the kid cold and that you’re feeling under the weather! My husband was feeling off at the beginning of last week, and I’ve spent the last 6 days feeling like hell – raspy voice, can’t talk without coughing, etc. I hate this time of year.

    And I hate sippy cups, too. My daughter is very particular about them, too. The straws have to be clear and can’t be too thin. Ridiculous. 😉