I have two younger sisters (we are each about 2 years apart). The “middle” sister and her husband stayed for three nights and my youngest sister and her husband and children met up with us for a nice long day on Friday.
The “middle” sister is expecting. We had a 14 month old Mac to keep amused. And my youngest sister’s children are 11 and 6. Plus, it was like 110 degrees outside on Friday. And my Brothers-in-law are keen on lots of cold beer and good food.
How the hell do you possibly find an activity that will appeal to such diverse interests?
I’ll give you a hint, it’s much more enjoyable for you if you don’t have a headache from hell.
I gave this considerable (and by that I mean, unselfish and mostly not self-serving) consideration. When I have company, I want them to have an awesome visit. I want them to know what a fun place Baltimore is. I want them to believe I do not lead a life of quiet desperation where a day without an excrement disaster plus a 3 minute shower is the BEST DAY EVER!
So I reached deep into my Baltimore Tourism bag of tricks and I pulled out the Trifecta: Lunch at Little Havana, a visit to the American Visionary Arts Museum (AVAM), and Happy Hour at Leinenkugel’s Beer Garden.
Brother in Law: ”I’d rather pull out my eyelashes with a pair of rusty needle nosed pliers than visit an art museum.”
He relented after a 3 beer lunch and some wings with a panoramic view of the water at Little Havana.
My sister’s kids loved the food. And so did Mac.
After everyone had a chance to mellow out a tad, we headed to the AVAM.
I was nervous as hell.
But the AVAM NEVER disappoints.
There’s always something for everyone.
And we spent an enjoyable couple of air-conditioned hours expanding our imaginative horizons.
(at least that’s what I thought was happening). . .
Middle Sister RE: her Husband: “I can’t believe he’s actually interested in something. Look at him.”
We watch him examining a sculpture of some rusty machinery or farm implements.
Me: ”Oh, this was a good idea! Everyone seems to be enjoying themselves.”
Sister approaches her Husband to hear his thoughts.
Sister returns to me and whispers, “I spoke too soon. He just asked me ‘How the fuck this was art?’”
The other Brother-in-Law after examining an exhibit that involves the roundness of eggs. . .and features some nudes, loudly proclaims, ”Check out the detail on that one. There’s a slit and everything.”
This is starting to feel like a colossal FAIL.
But then we head to the lower level of the main AVAM building. . .
And there it was: The Magic Farting Post and exhibit curated by Bob Benson.
And we laughed and laughed and laughed.
This is a family that apparently appreciates fART.